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kataomoi: unrequited love

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Heartbroken... [04 Oct 2005|01:17pm]

[ mood | rejected ]

That natural high is gone... The feeling: gone. LIke it was never there... The butterflies in my stomach:dead. I am hurt and bitter at the world right now. I gave everything to you and you tore me to shreds. I was only for you amusement. I gave my heart to you and you ground it to dirt. You gave your heart to someone else, while mine was still in your hands. How could you do that?? Of all the things I have done to make things work... I guess it wasn't good enough. You really can't make someone love you. I believe in unrequited love, I do. I guess that kind of love just wasn't between us afterall...

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I think I've fallen... [14 Aug 2005|08:54pm]

What is this I'm feeling? I just cant explain... When you're around, I'm just not the same... When I hear your voice I smile. You're my last thought before I go to sleep and even in my dreams, there's you. I wake up looking forward to when I can see you and laugh with you and just be around you. I have never felt so beautiful, than when I'm around you. You make me glow with happiness and without you I don't know what I would do. I love how we can talk for forever and still not be able to say everything. You're an amazing person and I'm so, incredibly lucky to have met you. I wish that I know you all my life, even if as friends. You know exactly what to say at the right time and everytime I feel like I can't go through with this painful ordeal called life you can pick me up. You're like a natural high without any downs. Even if I haven't known you as long as I've known my other friends, you know things about me I hate talking about to other people. You never judge me and you can straight out tell me that you're worried about me. I trust you. You have no idea how much I value your opinion. I'd be lost if I lost you. You know when I am upset and even though I know you sometimes think I am too emotional, you still make the effort to lighten my mood. When i was crying that one day in school, you knew that I needed space and you gave it to me. And when I came home that day, you called me and still asked me if I needed someone to talk to. I had asked you why you called and I recall you replying a simple "Well, you seemed upset and I was worried about you. I called to ask you if you were ok." Thank you for that. it was then I realized how fortunaute I was to have you. Thank you for putting up with me, and we boh know that that is sometimes a pretty difficult thing to do. Thank you for liking me for me, for all aspects of my personality. Haha, and you're also the only one who can scold me without me biting back. Im so lucky to have someone like you to talk to. I want to say thank you for never hesitating to make me laugh. I admire the way you can listen to my problems and always have something to say to make me feel better. You know that when I get mad at you, it's because of me being me. haha. We both know that I can get mad about anything. Thank you for putting up with my backbiting, unbearable whining, and endless complaints. All other people would given up on me a long time ago. Thank you for being a friend. Thank you for always telling me exactly what you think. I know I vex you with my insistant anger, and I'm sorry for sometimes venting it out on you. But I realize that I can do that and not have you get too mad or upset at me. Thank you for knowing what things you can laugh at me about without me being offended. And what things you can't laugh about because I would get offended. You understand me and so often I find myself opening up to you. So often I find myself thinking about what you have said to me about the thing I happen to be doing (like yelling at my sister). You're still the only one who can make me feel guilty about being such a bitch, by the way. That is an incredible feat. How are you doing this anyway? I'm sorry for all the times I've yelled at you, slapped you, mocked you, used you, even. I'm so glad that you are a forgiving person and the next day, all my offenses are wiped clean and I have a new slate to work with. I take you for granted, I know. Also, if you got in trouble for that one time we talked until almost 2 in the morning, sorry. You have no idea how the little things you say affect me. Haha, I'm glad you like my lips. I love how we can both talk about how hot other people are without it being wierd or strained. haha, angelina jolie IS pretty... and yes, jude law is BANGIN!!! Even though chances are we won't know each other in the future, I'm glad that you think you'll remember me and still take me to Venice and Paris bungee jumping. You make me laugh so easily, its ridiculous. You almost killed me the other night with the news of that crazy woman who castrated her husband and the investgator found his .. erm... MANHOOD in the bushes. haha... I am truly lucky to have you for a friend. Haha, I'm not sure you can say the same about me though, me being the loud, angry, bitter, bitchy, whiny, pain in the ass I am. haha. Yes, I'm done now. haha. Thank you. THose two words are no where near how I feel about all the little things you've done for me. But you cath my drift, right?
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unrequited love [20 Jun 2005|09:58pm]
[ mood | drained ]

I've been very stressed lately, my long-term relationship is terrible and has got progressively worse over the past few years. The last 6 months have been horrendous. It all accumulated to a head during my exams which have just finished. I started to like this guy on my course at uni, I'd always sort of noticed him throughout the year, but hadn't really thought about him, until about 2 months ago. The feelings got stronger, we started talking towards the end of the year and the more I talked to him, the more I liked him. Then came the end of year bash at the union bar, he said he was going, but he didn't go. Anyway, as I had been building myself up to tell him about my feelings for him, I couldn't leave the situation hanging until October, so I sent him a text (I had developed some confidence through gin) telling him what I felt for him and that I had to get it off my chest. I didn't hear from him that night, and on waking the next morning to a painful sense of embarrassment, I sent him another text, apologising for the previous night's message, while blaming it on being drunk. Later in the day, I received a message from him, he apologised for taking so long to reply, as he had been very drunk the night before and had not woken up until 1pm the next day. Although I believed he must have known that I really liked him, he said he had no idea and was quite shocked, he was sorry that he didn't feel the same towards me, but that he liked me as a friend and hoped it could stay that way. He said he hoped I would have a nice summer if he didn't see me. There were another couple of messages exchanged that day, but I thought I wouldn't be seeing him until October. I told my boyfriend about everything, he was gutted. We had a quiet couple of days, we actually got on better than we had for months, or years even, but we had a massive argument one night and I thought it had confirmed that we would have to split up. I was split between wanting to make a go of it, because of our daughter, and leaving him, even though Tom didn't want me. I decided to make a go of it, and started to make an effort to improve things. I actually stopped thinking about Tom so much and thought I would cope with being friends.
I was at the uni last Friday, about to pick my daughter up from the nursery, when someone said hello, I didn't even notice him before that. It was pretty embarrassing at first, but he is such a genuinely lovely guy, he put me right at ease, he didn't want me to be embarrassed and admitted that he was quite flattered by it. Anyway, all I can think about now is Tom, I just can't get him out of my mind. I feel like I can't be bothered to make an effort with my relationship because it's not what I really want. I would really rather be on my own. I can't help thinking or rather, hoping that if Tom gets to know me better when we go back, then he'll start to like me. He's not physically the type I'd go for, I would never usually fancy a guy who's short (Tom is slightly shorter than me, and I'm only 5'5''. He is such a nice person, he's clever, unbelievably laid back, he wants to do things that I'd like to do, I just bloody love him. I believe this to be love and NOT infatuation, because I wouldn't want him to get involved with me while I'm in a relationship, I like him too much. I've been in a relationship like that a long time ago and it's horrible, I wouldn't wish it on him. Having said that, it doesn't stop me from fantasising about him and me in some situation or another, doing things that we'd both like to do, travelling together and sharing our lives. This is doing me in, I can't bloody cope and function properly when I'm thinking like this. HELP!!!!!!

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Newbie [28 Jun 2004|11:51am]

[ mood | anxious ]

Hi everyone,
Thought i would tell everyone about my unrequited love.
I have known him for some time he is associated with my ex in business. He has a gf. but he thinks she is a bitch.
He knows i like him but has only known for a few days.
He said we might be able to meet up and the end of the week.
Im pretty anxious just wondering if he will call or wont he.

But i dont want to be a homewrecker. they dont have children or anything like that they do live together though.

So i was thinking of becoming a really good friend of his and being there for him if things are bad between them.. Im not sure that they will last much longer but i dont want them to break up because of me.
Any advice?


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[16 Jun 2003|11:13pm]

Hey everyone, I just joined :)

In my case - I'm infatuated with my best friend, who happens to be a guy (Pat). We have a love/hate relationship...it's the wierdest thing I've ever experienced. It seems like we both like each other, but never at the same time.

Everyone says you "want what you can't have", so when one stops liking the other, reverse effect happens. I can get depressed easily over it, and I get jealous frequently, but I guess things aren't so bad right now.

Sometimes I just wish he would be mean to me all of the time rather than...

1) Him being mean to me
2) Me getting mad and stop liking him
3) Him like me and flirt with me
4) I start to like him again...
5) He stops liking me
6) Him being mean to me
etc, etc...

Don't know if anyone's ever been in this situation. I'll keep you updated.
(I write about it a lot in my journal, although this isn't my main one - my main one is kept on my site: http://squealer-reloaded.com )
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*doink* [02 Apr 2003|01:24pm]

Krissy, I made it! *bounces in and sighs dreamily*

Merrick/Princess Shayla from Wild Force...that's my unrequited love couple....*melt*
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[20 Mar 2003|11:06pm]

this is strictly unrequited. :D

and in other words, welcome to the community! please don't be shy to share your own experiences, or post a fic, or fanart, or start a discussion. :D
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